Sometimes, and it is rare, my situation gets to me. It does take a lot, by definition I am a very strong person. I handle personal crisis well but occasionally it gets too much. I can only juggle so many things at any one time, today got a bit too much.
Started last night when I got in from work, my ex was kind enough to leave the usual school letters and bills to be filled in, signed and paid and then to be returned to the school. Quite why she cannot pick up a pen and at least fill them in is beyond me but I am well used to it. However, there were a few more than normal.
I had come home with £24 in my wallet, proud I had made it through the week after withdrawing £50. I figured that would get me though the weekend but no, and you can guess what is coming here, the school forms requiring payment equalled £24. Totally gutted…my wallet was now empty. Whatever I try to do, every week I end up with no money. It annoyed me and just felt a little deflated.
Today I received 2 letters, the first was a fine from my bank for my business bank account going overdrawn. This was expected as I have ceased trading. This letter will be dealt with by my Insolvency Practitioner but it was still unpleasant to receive the letter. I knew it was was bad as it was HAND SIGNED! Normally bank letters have printed signatures, but not mine.
Onto letter 2. My energy company is putting up my direct debit by a whopping £46/month. This is an additional £500/year. This was my breaking point today, I just feel like I always lose. No matter how many savings I make, or things I sell, or cuts to spending I perform I somehow always end up back at square one. I have mentioned this before, once you are at the bottom of the pit then somehow you stay there. It does seem that you need that lucky win, or lottery win, to pull your out.
I wonder how many other people in debt feel this way. This never ending drain on your funds? Perhaps when you are affluent you don’t notice these little things but sadly I do notice them. I just want a break here, it is so hard keeping everything paid and up to date as a single parent.
It is now only 7 weeks till Christmas too. Something really needs to happen, financially, and quick.